Video's on "compact disc"? BAH!!! Everyone knows that the RCA SelectaVision CED player will be format of choice for years!!!

__________________
Three more weeks....
DALEK'S UBER-PSYCHOTRONIC DVD COLLECTION OF DOOM! LORD DALEK HATES YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE!
THE 2008 TOON ZONE PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION! or: Pantomime Horse Vs. _______________ - The Battle for Burkina Faso

There's a lot of talk about "Definitive Edition" DVDs and "Ultimate Edition" blu-rays. The truth is there has never been a "Definitive" or "Ultimate" format for video.

Until now.

As I watched the high definition format war unfold on my computer screen from the armchair of my candle-lit loft, I knew that my 1980's medical horror drama, Garth Marenghi's Darkplace, would need to buck the trend. It had already been released on DVD, and putting that all together was a major hassle. I must have wasted at least three hours filming the special features.

Rather than being re-released and re-re-released, I thought it best to spend the royalty payments for my latest chiller (Slicer VI: The Class Cut-Up, in finer used bookstores) on developing a new technology that will ultimately replace every video format ever conceived.

So prepare, weary and impoverished home entertainment connoisseur (that means "buyer"), for in three short months you will be able to witness Garth Marenghi's Darkplace in ultra high definition MHDVI. (Mareng-Hi-Definition Video Implant) Just plug the digital video capsule (patent pending) into your left eye and prepare to be bombarded again and again with the shrieks, scares, and sex of the most controversial series to ever grace the airwaves.

You're welcome.

__________________
"There are rebels, and there are innovators. I'm a rebel. I play a rebel brain expert who's in rebellion against conventional logic, who's in rebellion against the world order. The show is about rebellions. And if that's not being an innovator, then I don't know what is."
-Garth Marenghi on Garth Marenghi's Darkplace

Please take a sojurn (That means "visit") to my website, www.garthmarenghi.com.

There are even talks of releasing entire seasons of TV shows on DVD! That's both crazy and impossible! Companies would never do that when they can continue to sell single releases of a few hand selected episodes.

Screw that. BETAMAX is making a comeback.

__________________
Jag man you know I tear up every time I see you 'round." -RD

I think Kevin Smith said it best on his laserdisc commentary for "Chasing Amy". I don't like how DVDs force you to watch letterboxed versions of movies. Atleast the VHS versions are in pan-and-scan, which fills the area of your whole screen. Now if only I could find a TV that was in color.

No, no, no, no, no you dumbass. Quarter-inch tape machines and Betamax are clearly the way to go. Just wait. You'll see!

__________________
"The electronic devices, the hi-fi and TV, are a common highway passing through all the houses in America, and there is no resistance to it. Privacy, which means the possibility of having a different life from what is most popular, disappears."
Allan Bloom (1988)

"Unless you're ashamed of yourself now and then, you're not honest."
William Faulkner

YOU DARE INSULT ME?!??? /Chops the heathen's headoff with Discovision.

__________________
Three more weeks....
DALEK'S UBER-PSYCHOTRONIC DVD COLLECTION OF DOOM! LORD DALEK HATES YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE!
THE 2008 TOON ZONE PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION! or: Pantomime Horse Vs. _______________ - The Battle for Burkina Faso

VHS sucks! LaserDisc is where it's at.
LaserDisc is bigger than VHS, so it must be better.

__________________
ASF: You will download Adult Swim promos and intros because we told you to.
[bump worthy]: You will download Adult Swim bumps because ASF doesn't have them.
---------------------
27