TROLL: Sire, I've dispatched two of your best troops to bring in another hero. They were instructed to return by the weekend.
BOSS: "Hero?" Hear me, boy. Those cretins are anything but heroes.
BOSS: They are murderers.
MEANWHILE..
KUSE: Well Mare, I'm off. Need me to pick up anything on the way back from the Advent Calendar?
MARE: No, but why don't you take Box along with you? He was crying the whole time you were gone yesterday. Box misses his daddy!
KUSE: This sudden push for me to take Box with me wouldn't have anything to do with a certain DVD box set of 24 Season 4 I saw on your desk, would it?
MARE: I need to know how Logan rose to power!
MEANWHILE..
LEGOTRON: What?! You guys are insane. A Garfield Christmas Special was way better than A Charlie Brown Chirstmas. Remember the part when Grandma put all that chili pepper in Ma Arbuckle's stew? That was awesome!
DOCTOR: Awesome, maybe, but she didn't put it in Ma Arbuckle's stew, Legotron. That was obviously a vegetable dish. They were eating turkey -- why would they need stew, too?
JAMES LIPTON: That's a remarkablous point, Doctor, but let's not forget Frosty The Snowman. Gorgeous animation, a remarkablous soundtrack -- it had it all!
WAITERBOT: What is wrong with you people? Scrooged was obviously the pinnacle of Christmas entertainment! It beats Garfield and Snoopy and Frosty every time!
LEGOTRON: Yeah, it does, but too bad we're ranking the best Christmas television specials here, Waiterbot. Scrooged is a movie. Next time, don't join the conversation late.
WAITERBOT: But Scrooged had nipples!
LATER!
TIGERBOY: Wow, looks like we got another big one today, Knacks!
KNACKS:Yeah. Listen, Tigerboy...before we build this, I had something I wanted to ask you.
KNACKS: Be honest. Why do you dress like a tiger?
MEANWHILE...
MISTA SNOWMAN: Oh boy oh boy OH BOY! Another day spent at the Playmobil Advent Calendar! And here I thought Christmas wasn't for another two weeks!
MISTA SNOWMAN: Look at the size of that box! Today's box is magic!
KUSE: Ugh, I knew I should've rented a truck for this. How are we gonna lug whatever's inside this thing back home?
MISTA SNOWMAN: I know! We'll use magic!
MEANWHILE...
TIGERBOY: ...and that's why I decided to dress like a tiger. Incredible story, right?
KNACKS: I. Cannot believe. The words. I've just heard.
KNACKS: Wheeeeeeeeeeee!
MEANWHILE...
KUSE: Dead branches.
KUSE: We got...dead branches.
MISTA SNOWMAN: Oooooohoohoo! Magical dead Christmas branches!
MISTA SNOWMAN: Kuse, tell me...if I broke into song right now...like, let's say, the Rice-A-Roni ad jingle...would you consider it a non-sequitur?
KUSE: Yes that would be a non-sequitur and don't you dare. You know how much I hate those.
MISTA SNOWMAN: Okay, but let's say...let's assume I actually had a box of Rice-A-Roni with me right now! Then it'd sort of be on-topic, right? I think I have to sing it, Kuse. I think I have to sing the Rice-A-Roni song.
KUSE: Snowman, if you sing that song, I swear to God I'll fucking kill you.
MISTA SNOWMAN: I don't know how I can't, Kuse! I mean, there's a box of Rice-A-Roni right here! Magical Christmas Rice-A-Roni!
KUSE: That's it, your ass is tasting fist and not in a good way.
BOX: Googoogaga?
BOX: Gagagagagoo?
BOX: Ahahagaga! Ahahagoo!
KUSE: GIVE ME THAT GOD DAMNED BOX!
MISTA SNOWMAN: I don't control the box, Kuse! It controls me! It wants me to sing! It's about to make me sing!!!
