KUSE: Nice of Santa to let us use his house for the Christmas party, huh?
MARE: Aww it was the least he could do after I saved his ass.
KUSE: I love you.
MARE: I know.
MEANWHILE...
KNACKS: You're leaving already?! Why can't you stay?!
MARE II: Knacks, you're sweet, and I really, really care about you. It's just that I've done a lot of rotten things this Christmas. I've gotta atone for them.
KNACKS: But Mare...half the people in that house have either killed someone or at least tried to kill someone. Trust me, they don't care!
MARE II: It's not about that, Knacks. You showed me the right path, but only I can really walk into the light. Besides, I won't be gone forever. I'll be back real soon.
KNACKS: Really? You'll really come back?
MARE II: Course! What, you think I want to give you a chance to develop the ol' wandering eye?
KNACKS: Are you saying we're boyfriend and girlfriend???
MARE II: I'm saying you're my bitch.
KNACKS: Good luck, Mare! Come back SOON! Merry Christmas!
MARE II: Oh shit Knacks...I almost forgot!
KNACKS: What?
MARE II: <3 <3 <3
MARE II: There, now you've got something to brag to your buddies about besides your 700 friend count on MySpace. See ya around, Knacks.
KNACKS: I rule.
LATER!
TIGERBOY: That new Mare had to jet, huh? You slip her the tongue or what?
KNACKS:Some people don't like to talk about their personal business, Tigerboy.
TIGERBOY: Ah, okay, whatever you want.
KNACKS: Of course I slipped her the fucking tongue.
KNACKS: Hrm. I guess we should check out the LEGO Advent Calendar one last time. Since Claire had us hog-tied, we've gotta get yesterday's gift and today's!
TIGERBOY: Before we go...I just wanted to tell ya...I'm really glad we became friends.
KNACKS: Me too! Don't tell Kuse, but you may very well be my best friend.
TIGERBOY: Oh come on, you HAVE to let me tell Kuse that.
KNACKS: If you say anything, just say that you're "tied" with him or something. He's...frah-GEE-lay.
LATER!
MISTA SNOWMAN: Santa, seriously, how awesome are you? Exactly how awesome? I can't believe you're letting us party our brains out in your house! Your magical Christmas house!
SANTA: It ain't no thang, snowbro. The way I see it, it's good karma.
SANTA: And trust me, I need some good karma right about now. I'm gonna have to cancel my big Tahiti plans because that bitch burned the 2006 Santa to death. I'm being forced into a second term -- obviously, I got myself some bad karma somehow.
KNACKS: Maybe not, Santa! I think you're off the hook! You've gotta see what we pulled out of the LEGO Calendar today!
SANTA: Knacks, it's a nice tree, but I don't think it's going to help me get out of doing this Santa gig for a second year.
KNACKS: No, not the tree! Okay, listen...so we get to the calendar, right? First we pulled out the gifts for the 23rd. It was lame stuff, like a fire extinguisher and whatnot. And please tell me you're catching the irony of us getting a fire extinguisher mere days after that shitface set our house ablaze.
SANTA: It's not lost on me.
KNACKS: Good. Okay, so we finish building the gifts for the 23rd, and then we move onto today's. There was more than one gift in today's box. First I pulled out a giant fireplace, and then some other thing. And then I pulled out...something else.
KNACKS: Look behind you, Santa.
LEGO SANTA: I understand there's an opening in the "2006 Santa" department. If you're game, I'm game.
SANTA: Oh fuck yes! This is incredible! I didn't know LEGO had Santa Clauses! I'm free! I'm free! Tahiti here I come! Mele Kalikimaka!
SANTA: Knacks, you rock. This is the best present an apathetic Santa Claus could ever get!
KNACKS: I'm glad you like it. He's really feisty. It took three tries and four Tigerboy tackles for me to finish building him.
MEANWHILE...
LEGOTRON: So you're the new guy, eh? What's your name again? Omega Apples or something?
WILLIAM: William, I'm just William. You must be Legotron. Everyone's told me so much about you.
LEGOTRON: Did they tell you how bad I am at poker? Seriously, I make crazy bets and I never win a hand! Are you a betting man, Billy?
DOCTOR: Okay that's enough, Legotron. Stop trying to cheat the newbie out of his head.
LEGOTRON: Spoilsport.
DOCTOR: Come with me, Alpha Omega. I'll introduce you to our talking owl.
MEANWHILE...
WAITERBETTY: This blows! Last year, we came this close to running this place! Remember that, dear? We took control of Santa's estate and nearly ran this place into bankruptcy! The times we had! Oh, if only we could turn back time.
WAITERBOT: I dunno, Waiterbetty...I'm oddly content with things the way they are now.
MEANWHILE...
BOX: Zap?
BOX: Zap!
BOX: Zapped.
MEANWHILE...
JAMES LIPTON: What IS your favorite curse word?
LATER!
KUSE: It hasn't been that bad of a year, has it?
MARE: No way! Box was born, I killed Claire and we had tons of implied sex.
KUSE: Maybe we should start doing this for Easter, too.
MISTA SNOWMAN: KUSE! I went to the Playmobil Advent Calendar and grabbed the last gift! Hope you don't mind that I went without you -- I just couldn't take the suspense!
KUSE: It's okay. What'd we get?
MISTA SNOWMAN: That's the best part! Follow me, guys!
MISTA SNOWMAN: Look at this thing! It's a giant jukebox thing that plays Christmas music when you press this gigantic button on the back of it! Here, press it! Isn't this amazing?!!
KUSE: I gotta admit...she's a real beaut.
MARE: Let's have a sing-along!
EVERYONE:"It's that time! Christmas time is here! Everybody knows there's not a better time of year! Hear that sleigh! Santa's on his way! Hip hip hooray for Christmas Vacation!"
WAITERBETTY:"O commmme, all ye faiiiiithfulllll..."
