KNACKS: Do you think I'm stupid for keeping this? It's pretty ragged.
TIGERBOY: Nah. It's sweet. Very Charlie Brown-esque. So what if it's half burned? We still needed a Christmas tree.
KNACKS: You're right. Incidentally, do you have any idea if you're supposed to capitalize the "t" in "tree" when you're talking about Christmas trees?
TIGERBOY: No clue.
KNACKS: Me either.
LEGOTRON: Guys, why does it smell like fire in here?
TIGERBOY: Knacks put up last year's Christmas tree. It's a little scorched, but we pointed the really bad side towards the wall.
LEGOTRON: Yeah but it still reeks like overcooked hot dogs. You're stinking up the whole house.
KNACKS: Don't be a Grinch, Legotron. Where's your Christmas spirit?
LEGOTRON: I'm going to run a few errands. That thing better be outside by the time I get back, or we're going to have a problem.
TIGERBOY: "Run a few errands," suuuure. I think we both know where he's going.
KNACKS: How is it even possible to have sex with Waiterbetty, anyway?
TIGERBOY: What, you've never seen The Re-Animator?
KNACKS: That's fucking gross, dude.
MEANWHILE...
I JUST CAME HERE TONIGHT TO SAY
I JUST WANT TO SAY
I JUST WANT TO SAY...
MERRY CHRISTMAS, BABY! YOU SURE DID TREAT ME NIIIII-HIII-YIIII-YIIII-IIIIICE....
MARE: Mista Snowman, please! We have a situation here!
WAITERBOT: What do you think, girl? Is this "fairy tale" motif a problem?
MARE: I'm gonna need to see the Advent Calendar in person. If it's what I think it is...eh...nah, it couldn't be.
WAITERBOT: I hate it when people act cryptic. Do you think you've made yourself seem more interesting to me? Well, you have not.
MARE: Let's go get today's Playmobil gift. I'll play tagalong with you guys.
WAITERBOT: Fine, but I'm not giving up shotgun just because you're coming.
MEANWHILE...
JAMES LIPTON: It appears that I am the only one here!
JAMES LIPTON: Finally! A chance to practice my bear impressions in peace!
JAMES LIPTON: ROAR, ROAR ROAR ROAR! HERE I GO, LOOTING THE PICNIC BLANKET! ROAR, THAT'S WHAT I DO! I'M A BEAR ROAR!
JAMES LIPTON: Good lord, I've gotten even better at it! Oh, to what ends will this great talent take me?!
JAMES LIPTON: Roarmarkablous!
...
LATER!
KNACKS: Just gotta do one last torque and...okay, all finished!
TIGERBOY: Soooo...what is it?
KNACKS: I think that big piece is a tool organizer. The smaller piece looks like one of those crappy robots Uncle Owen ignored.
TIGERBOY: Can you remember getting this in any of the previous Advent Calendars? Is LEGO rinsing and repeating, or what?
KNACKS: I'm not really sure. There's been a ton of shitty, tool-related LEGO gifts. They all start to blend together after a while.
MEANWHILE...
WAITERBOT: See what I mean, Mare? This can't be right. Why would the Advent Calendar look like this?
MARE: It's just what I was afraid of...
MARE: When I was a little girl, I'd always hear stories about Playmobil Advent Calendars from other dimensions. Like, ours has to do with Christmas, but in a different dimension, the Advent Calendar might have a bee theme, or a Hawaiian luau theme. I don't know which dimension this one came from, but obviously, it has a fairy princess theme.
WAITERBOT: You're telling me that this thing came from another dimension?! That's...well, actually that's pretty cool!
MARE: Not really. It was made for people who could handle different sets of circumstances than we can. There's no telling what might come out of these boxes. Let's find today's gift and make sure it isn't dangerous.
MISTA SNOWMAN: Way ahead of ya, Mare-y lady! We got a shiny new parrot! A shiny holiday parrot!
MARE: Okay, well...I guess a parrot doesn't sound too dangerous. Just try not to touch it...it could be radioactive.
MISTA SNOWMAN: Do you know what else is radioactive?
SLEIGH BELLS! THEY REALLY ARE!
MARE: God I miss Kuse...
MEANWHILE...
KUSE: That does it! Now they've gone too far!
KUSE: As if it wasn't bad enough that they're making me work day and night all throughout the holidays...now I find out that THIS is my Christmas bonus? Holiday-themed office carpeting?! I can't even take it home!
KUSE: Joe...Joe are you in, today?
JOE: Of course. 24/7, same as you. What's up?
KUSE: This Christmas bonus! What the fuck, man?! Did they pull this shit last year?
JOE: Last year's was worse. Our bonus consisted of an e-card, starring a reindeer with ornaments hanging from its antlers.
KUSE: Fuck this, I'm starting a petition. Do me a favor, see if the guy next to you would be willing to sign.
JOE: Sure thing, buddy. Sounds like an awesome idea.
JOE: Hey, break room! Anybody home?
VINNY: That you, Joe? What's the matter?
JOE: Vinny? Vinny listen...Kuse is starting a petition to get the company to give us real Christmas bonuses this year. You in?
VINNY: Fuck yeah! Rage against the carpet!
JOE: Sweet. See if the tech team wants in, would ya?
VINNY: Hey, tech dudes! Ya there? We're going to petition the company into giving us a cash money bonus. You down?
...tech dudes? Hey tech dudes, where are you?
VINNY: Sorry Joe, looks like they're out to lunch or something. I can leave a clipboard in the break room, though.
VINNY: A clipboard holding the petition sign sheet, I mean. I wasn't going to leave an empty clipboard behind. That'd be silly!
