MISTA SNOWMAN: This is driving me crazy! Why can't I remember my top secret plan?
SANTA: Maybe you set up a radio-controlled bomb somewhere?
MISTA SNOWMAN: No Santa that's stupid.
WAITERBOT: Idiot Snowman, give it up! It's obvious that you have no plan beyond throwing meat around, as if that's epic enough to satisfy the build. STOP TALKING ABOUT THIS PLAN.
KUSE: Uhh...guys?
KUSE: We have a visitor.
MARE: Well this is an unexpected twist.
WAITERBOT: Maybe all the horse blood we drank was drugged?
FREDDY: So this must be the place!
WAITERBOT: Hey, I know that guy! He was in a nightmare I had about Natasha Bedingfield!
MARE: What?! He's been in my dreams, too!
SANTA: Seriously? That dude has been haunting me for over a month! I can barely sleep at all anymore!
I TOO HAVE HAD EXPERIENCES
FREDDY: Ah, I see that the gang's all here!
FREDDY: I'm Freddy Krueger, and this is Jason Voorhees. We were once made of paper, but then we drank expired soda and entered the third dimension.
MARE: That's all fine, but what do you want with us?
FREDDY: "Blah blah blah taking over your holiday, blah blah blah killing you on Christmas morning, blah blah blah higher power."
FREDDY: In the meantime, Jason and I will take care of your pathetic Advent Calendar. There could be no greater insult to Christmas, and that is our primary goal!
FREDDY: Rope this bitch and put her with the rest. She's too pretty to open before Christmas.
PEAR: I shouldn't even be here. Their issues are obviously with you jerks.
MARE: Maybe if you hadn't imprisoned us with the intention of eating our flesh, we could've nipped this crap in the bud.
PEAR: Weak argument. You kept me tied up for a hell of a lot longer than you've been here.
SANTA: Mare and Pear, stop this at once! Can't you see that we're in this together now? We must call a truce and deal with the bigger issues!
PEAR: Okay, but let's be clear. This truce is temporary.
MARE:Very temporary.
FREDDY: Corpses and horse shit! A true pleasure palace!
FREDDY: It seems that today's gift is a dog.
JASON: ....
FREDDY: True, but aren't "puppies" dogs anyway?
FREDDY: I think it's time for us to illustrate the full extent of our depravity. Nobody expects puppy slaughter. We'll be universally known as line-crossing rebels who--
