Airforce- Ar! Ar ar!
Bender- He's so cute!
Alissa- Yes.

Syrax falls from the sky and lands face first into a box on the ship.

Bender- Syraxy!
Alissa- What happened?
Syrax- I died.
Bender- Again? Jebus boy, you must stop!
Airforce- Ar!
Syrax- What the hell is that?
Bender- That's Airforce. He's a seal.
Syrax- That's disgusting.
Airforce- Ar ar!

jukester

Hey, OV, I can e-mail you the first part of this present sitcom if you want.
---
"You do not know, my son, with how little wisdom the world is governed." ~ Axel Oxenstierna {åß}

McGray looks up at the stars. He glances down and washes the blood from his hands in the stream. His hair is cluttered and long, worn with sweat and blood. He cleans his newly found Blessed Sword which he had purchased at the local shop. After he left Suicune in the temple, he embarked on a solo journey to purify himself. Jeaton's words that night spoke to him in such a way to drive into a mindless crusade of false purification, but McGray doesn't know that. He travelled the sea to reach a peninsula. In this peninsula, there is much looting and crime there, particularly in the city of Gorining. There, he's learned of a group of criminals in a gang. They steal from the villagers. McGray believes they must be stopped. While he can only do so much, he has already prevented three robberies, two assaults, and one rape during his 5 day stay. We join McGray after the latest...

Fishy- McGray! That was great work. Thanks, man.
McGray- No problem...

Fishy da Chief
22
Water
Fencer
"Splishy splashy!"

McGray wipes his hands from the water. He stands up and walks past the dead bodies of the criminals.

McGray- We need to know more about this gang. They will continue their crimes until something is done.
Fishy- Well, we know one thing. Their leader. They call him... Mario.
McGray- I will remember that.

They walk back to town.

jukester

Alissa- Hey where'd Bender go?
Syrax- ???

jukester

[This message was deleted at the request of the original poster]

I hope.

jukester

Hurray.
---
Ðøç+ø® Þh¡£ {Ū}
Woo! It's about time that the evil Amanda was overthrown! -Element

Why is McGray smart all of a sudden? That's not accurate representation, jukester.

---
I'm an elitist. Hug me.

It was great, until you took me out. I = key to success.

Sorry Bender. The misrepresentation department called me and sweared a lot. Then they called me black.

jukester

Hey, OV, I can e-mail you the first part of this present sitcom if you want.

Thanks. My e-mail is "oblivionviruses@aol.com"

---
The ZSB: We don't take sigs as seriously as you do
{åß}

McGray entered the tavern. His eyes were darkened with black blood and dirt. He desperately needed a shower.

McGray- So how about that dinner, FakeDL.
FakeDL- Hey hey!
McGray- How about some of that good ol' steak?
FakeDL- Yessah!
McGray- And tell the bartend to freshen my beer.
FakeDL- I am the bartend hoo hah!
McGray- Oh yeah....

Fishy walks in.

Fishy- We have news on Mario's movements.
McGray- Have a steak.
Fishy- Gee thanks!

..More to come, Conan is on.

jukester

More seal, I say.
---
I must've kicked more guys in the nuts than I realized.~JJ

what'd ya do this time?
---
Why procrastinate now when you could procrastinate later?
http://s1.cgi.gamefaqs.com/boards/gentopic.asp?board=5141

Bender and Airforce are on an island.

Bender- I'm on an island.
Airforce- Ar!

They don't know how they got there.

Bender- We don't know how we got here.
Airforce- Ar!

They're stranded.

Bender- We're stranded.
Airforce- Ar!

They have wild inter-species sex.

Bender- Better be SaiyanGirl.
Airforce- ZING!

Canadian gets ready to leave. Being some sort of person who sleeps in hotels, he wears a suit. But being in the early ages, it looks nothing like a suit, but is instead palm fronds and a coconut bra.

Canadian- I'll leave the maid a tip.

He pees on the bed. As he leaves, he lights the room on fire.

Canadian- That'll show those boisterous kids.

jukester

This episode didn't make any sense! Tell the people!

---
I'm an elitist. Hug me.

C'mon, Bender, McGray has obvously just had a whirl under the tutelage of a female bird-thingie who always answers with questions and likes to torture her students and make potions out of her tears.

[waits for someone to get that]

Oh, and funny stuff.
---
"You do not know, my son, with how little wisdom the world is governed." ~ Axel Oxenstierna {åß}

QoL- Sigh, where is he?
HoT- Must we fly? I have a terrible fear of heights....
QoL- Yes. Now get me a soda.
HoT- ...
QoL- He's nowhere in this area. Damn.
HoT- Obviously, he must be in an area somewhere else.

Likewhoa jumps around. Ganondork tries to catch him. This goes on for a good hour and a half. Then, Likewhoa runs like the dickens up a slant to the mainland out of the canyon. Ganondork follows. After a good mile and a quarter, they end up at the temple where Suicune lay starved.

Habnot, JJ, DP, Duel, and Warlock leave the church. They search for a city and McGray.

JJ- I smell queef.....
Warlock- <_< >_> <_< >_> <_> >_<
JJ- I knew it was you, ***** face.

Monica runs back to Parallo. She rests in her hide out.

Scientist gets a message.

Scientist- Hmm... AV and his comrades would like me to join them, eh? Must be about the crystal thingies. I wonder if that smelly kid found them yet.

If only he knew.... Then he'd be disappointed.

jukester

Bravo.

---
The ZSB: We are the paragon of humanity. You may worship us. From afar.
SPOOKAY!™, it's Royal Guardsman Mac!

QoL- Yes. Now get me a soda.

Thank you
---
Damn you Fishy! - jukester
The ZSB: Enough said

Tha comes out with his map.

Tha- I have a map!
AV- Holy **** can you wait until Sci gets here.
Tha- ...Maybe!!!
AV- Meh. He should be here any minute. I'm getting impatient, though.
AP- I see him on his technologically advanced vehicle. Damn him.

Scientist enters the room.

Sci- What's up, people?
AV- Well, you know about the three artifacts, correct?
Sci- Of course. I am a scientist.

He nods with a cheezy grin.

AV- Ok, Tha, show us the map. Explain it, too.
Tha- Yessah! Right here, we are in AV's hometown of Blinn. The Carpith Tunnel here connects Blinn with Lasly, where Scientist resides. Lasly is due north of Blinn. The Forest of Seduction and Mount Jeaton are west of Lasly. East of Lasly, is Parallo. This is where the Crystal of Wind was stolen by DL's men. DL's palace is north west of Parallo, but recently DL has vacated it. Tauto is over in the far west. Past Mount Jeaton. We have reason to believe DL is there now. South east of Tauto lies Bregenek. It's a major gang city, so DL may be able to have ties there. We suspect he's been in Tauto because his comrade, ZiH, lives there. Across the Sea of Mars, there's Nouvel Peninsula. There's also plenty of violent gangs there, but I doubt DL would travel overseas for money. South of Blinn about a good 20 miles is Lajuenesse where Coolguy resides. And a good distance east of Lajuenesse is the coastal city of Lapointe.

AP fell asleep.

AV- Dammit man. Wake up.
AP- ...syphilus.... what?
AV- This is important, pay attention.
Coolguy- Yeah man.
AV- Where are the last two crystals?
Tha- The Crystal of Earth is in Bregenek, but no one knows it. And the Crystal of Fire remains a mystery to all.
AV- Damn. Well we can get that crystal out of Bregenek and keep it safe here.

jukester

More me.
---
Will Turner: ...In a fair fight, I'd kill you.
Jack Sparrow: Then that's not much incentive for me to fight fair then, is it?

Mario had better not get a part before me....
---
Sometimes all I really want to feel is love.
Sometimes I'm angry that I feel so angry.

Fishsticks!
---
Filburt the turtle

This sitcom so pwns.

---
"You could no more evade my wrath...than you could your own shadow." ~DT
Thus Sayeth McGray

DL and ZiH walk out of the secret passage way.

DL- That was brilliant. Those fools are probably still there swiping randomly hoping for a hit.
ZiH- Heh, indeed. Hey... where's that weird woman that came in with you?
DL- ... QUARK!?!?

They run out of the room and search.

DL- Quark! Dammit you senile *****.

He glances out the window. She's sitting in the garden. They walk out.

Quark- You have ~~~ a pretty @@@ rock garden ~@ ZiH!
ZiH- ...Must you fiddle with my 2nd century diamond stones?!??
Quark- They're @@@ delectible! ~~~
DL- Dammit woman! Get inside! Respect the property of those who can kill you in a breath. We have business to speak of. ...Right ZiH?

ZiH kneels over his disorganized rock garden.

DL- Dammit man, fix that later.

ZiH reluctantly gets up and they go inside.

jukester

QoL and HoT land in Parallo Square. QoL thinks for a moment.

HoT- What is it?
QoL- Name the people who are somehow intertwined in this situation.
HoT- Like our comrades?
QoL- Yes.

He names all their comrades. QoL casts a spell and they all appear in Parallo Square.

JJ- What the bloody monkey poo!?
Warlock- REGIS PHILBIN THE FOURTH!
Duel- Eep!
DP- Oh geez...
Ganondork- I'm British!
QoL- Quiet, all of you.
JJ- Who are you?
QoL- I'm... someone who is able to help you find McGray. That's why I gathered you lot here.
Suicune- Good, he's been gone for too too long.

Bender looks around.

Bender- Well, Airforce, we seem to be on an island. But I can see a mainland over that-a-ways.
Airforce- Ar ar ar!

He jumps around flapping and making noises. Then Airforce mimicked Bender's actions.

jukester

Excellent episode.
---
"The ZSB: We Are So Much Better Than You."

QoL- Right then, tell me who the hell all of you are.
JJ- I'm the master of rhyme, please take your time, but if you ask me, I won't do mime. Sometimes at th-
Warlock- I'm Peaches. ...
JJ- ...I HATE YOU.
Duel- I'm Duel, pleased to meetcha, mistah!
QoL- You, the small annoying one.
Duel- Yesssss?
QoL- Don't talk when I'm around.

Duel makes a zipper with his lips and zips it in a very very very very childish fashion.

Suicune- I'm Suicune.
Ganondork- I be Ganondork. This is a squirrel I found.
Likewhoa- Thibit snork!
DP- I'm DP. Pleased to meet you.
HoT- Right that's everyone...

Monica walks into the group.

Monica- I'm the Terror who Corrects the Errors....
DP- Hi Monica!
Monica- Hey there.

In the vast fields outside of the limits of Tauto, Mac and SN talk.

Mac- What do you have there, kid?
SN- I swiped some stuff on my way out.
Mac- Really, let me see...

SN reveals some money, jewels, and a blue crystal.

Mac- Hmm... everything looks pretty worthless. Take what's small and the money. Everything else will stick out.
SN- But... I can take it all and sell it at the shop! It's just a few minutes' walk.
Mac- Meh, those guys will tear you up if they find you took their stuff. And Bregenek, you can't get a good deal there.
SN- Care to go to Parallo?
Mac- Not really.
SN- Oh.
Mac- ...
SN- ...

jukester

I am a genius!

Sapphire relaxes as he reads a porno mag. Smokey is outside training with Beefer. Antallic eats his Fruit Loops.

Sapphire- Whoo baby!
Antallic- Dammit man, I'm tired of eating these Honey Nut Cheerios!
Sapphire- Dude, those are Fruit Loops.
Antallic- Dammit man, I'm tired of getting stoned!
Sapphire- Stop whining, makes you look bad.

Antallic gets up and walks to his room. They've just been lounging around since Wacky left. They keep a close eye on the Crystal of Wind they have. As Antallic enters his bedroom and lies down on his bed, Wacky comes in.

Wacky- Those sons of *******.

Sapphire responds, barely moving.

Sapphire- What is it now, Wacky.
Wacky- They made me go over there just so they could run like little *****es.
Sapphire- Another day, another day. ...Who's the girl.
Tatl- Shut the hell up, spawn of curried rabbit.
Sapphire- You always lure the feisty wenches, don't you, Wacky.
Wacky- The ***** followed me here.
Tatl- Did not!
Wacky- Shut it.

Smokey comes in.

Smokey- Whoa, if I knew we'd be having female guests, I'd have worn a shirt.
Sapphire- We'd like you to wear a shirt anyway.
Smokey- Yeah? ...Too bad.

He goes to his room to get a shirt.

Sapphire- Did they at least tell you what they wanted?

He turns the page of the magazine.

Wacky- The crystal is some zany artifact thingy that's important to them. I suggest we burn it!
Sapphire- Ehhh whatever.

jukester

Jeaton- Ah that little bastard is trying to suck up to us or something.
krosser- huh i bet he just wants to mete me
Mars- What's he doing?
Jeaton- Trying to help the people in the one place by your sea.
Mars- Ah. Yeah that's kind of him.
Jeaton- He's getting off track. QoL better find him and straighten him out.
Polas- Polas agrees.

McGray eats his steak.

McGray- Saucy!
Fishy- So, Mario has been reported to be at the local club tonight to discuss business with some people.
McGray- I'll be there.
Fishy- Good good.

jukester

...and then Bender and his pet seal Airforce came in and kicked everyones ass!

---
I'm an elitist. Hug me.

XD
---
Fear the carnivorousWeeble. |LTL Freelance [? - ?] Kills- ?|Member of PIMP X)

Mac- Alright, I'll take you into Tauto, just watch out.
SN- Thanks!
Mac- We must move fast.

They dash into the town and find a bartering shop.

Mac- Hey lady!
Fragon- Yyyyyes?
Mac- You buy jewels?
Fragon- Yes, what do you have.
Mac- This ring.

He pulls out DL's ring.

Mac- This golden amulet... and where's the crystal?
SN- Oh, here is a crystal.

He pulls out the crystal. Fragon looks over the items.

Fragon- Eh... 4500 for the ring, 3300 for the amulet and 2200 for the crystal. Take it or leave it.
Mac- ****, that crystal is AT LEAST worth 4000. And you KNOW it.
Fragon- So that totals to... 10000 gold for you?
Mac- **** that, you know you're cheating us out of that crystal!
Fragon- ... Fine. I'll give you an extra 1000 for the crystal. Take it or leave it.
Mac- ... Fine.

They make the trade. Mac splits the earnings with SN. 5500 each.

jukester

i am truely enjoying this, its a shame, i just found the topic today...keep up the great work!
---
"screen name, you had a sadistic look on your face. As Alissa put it, you looked like you were going to go steal candy from some little children"~Duel

Fishy- Ok, you and a squad of my men will complete this mission. At the club, hosted by FlameCube, Mario is going to meet somewhere secluded, even if it's in the main room, it'll be in a dark corner. Keep a watch.
McGray- Okey doke.
Fishy- Time to meet the team.

They walk to Fishy's HQ. There, a team of four people await.

Fishy- Frank, Tediz, Narle, Cubfan, this is McGray.
McGray- Hey all.
Frank- Oh my god.
McGray- ...
Tediz- Don't mind ol' Franky, he's a little loose in the head. Heh!
Frank- Says Teditzo!
Narle- He has some weird delusions and he tries to make up nicknames.
Frank- GNARLY NARLE!
McGray- Well, as long as he keeps quiet tonight, things will be fine.

FrankJaeger
19
Earth
Doll Master
"Yeah well, shut up."

Tediz
20
Earth
Fencer
"As long as there's no stupidity involved, I'm game."

Narle
22
Earth
Knight
"I've been working here longer than you."

Cubfan
24
Water
Paladin
"Try me."

McGray- Well, are we all ready? I've got a plan for tonight.

He lays out the blueprints of the club.

McGray- FC's Club. First floor, the main room and entrance, we won't be using this entrance. Except for you, Cub.
Cub- Ok gotcha.
McGray- The rest of us will split in two and enter through the back. Tediz, you and me, then Narle and Frank. There's two entrances in the back: One for the alcohol that eventually leads to the bar, and one for food and waste that leads to the kitchen. Narle and Frank will enter through the bar area.
Narle- Yep.
McGray- Tediz and I will enter through the food area.
Tediz- Alright.

McGray explains the rest of the plan as none of them knows someone is watching them. And this time, his pants are on!

jukester

For anyone who wants to read the old sitcom, the Otter has granted us this present.

http://www.geocities.com/blisteredotter002/sitcompg1.html

But you have to change the number in the URL after the sitcompg to get to the next pages.

jukester

That number goes from 1 to 11.

jukester

The page links are fully functional now, so you don't have to type the page numbers in manually anymore.
---
"The important thing is that Polas is in your sig and that you're proud of it." Polas
"I like you, BO." DrPhil [aX]

I love you, jukester.
---
"The ZSB: We Are So Much Better Than You."

I picture you as a storm trooper.

jukester

As long as I have a part, I'm happy.
---
"The ZSB: We Are So Much Better Than You."

Cub walks up to the bouncer.

Monkey- Ee? EeE!
Cub- Yeah let me in, Monkey.

Monkey
???
???
Monkey
"Eee? EeeE?!?"

Monkey- EeE!

He lets Cub in. Cub looks around. The dance music is quite loud, the club is crowded. He awaits for his comrades.

Tediz and McGray walk near the food supply where crates of food are located. Some men are lifting it into the kitchen.

McGray- Oh, you guys need some help with that?

They turn around and McGray and Tediz throw pineapples at their heads, knocking them out.

Tediz- Bahahaha!

They enter the kitchen and steal some chef clothing and waiter clothing. They then start eating it.

jukester

ok this is pissing me off... both Franky and Monkey have parts before me.

At least Bender's starting to act normal again... <_<
---
Sometimes all I really want to feel is love.
Sometimes I'm angry that I feel so angry.

Ah, but monkeyboy just had to make some sort of appearance.... Good show.
---
"You do not know, my son, with how little wisdom the world is governed." ~ Axel Oxenstierna {åß}

QoL- Alright, so we need a plan.
Monica- Why don't we just go around to different cities here and ask around?
QoL- Sounds like a lot of walking.
HoT- I thought you could fly.
QoL- Only on weekends.
HoT- ...
QoL- I get free minutes.
Monica- Well, it seems we have about nine people here...
Canadian- Count me in, babe.

Canadian walks up to the group.

Canadian- I heard the whole thing, I've seen this McGray character once or twice, great guy.
Monica- Uhh.. sure...?
JJ- Oh great, another foreigner.
Warlock- So we have 5 groups of two?
Monica- Yep. Ganondork and Suicune, Warlock and Duel, JJ and DP, HoT and QoL, and ... ****.
Canadian- Hey hey hey!!!

jukester

Yo ho yo ho a pirate's life for me!
Hangin' with seals
And havin' bad meals
I'm ALWAYS out at sea!
We pillage we plunder
And Syrax keeps dying
Hump that mast me hearties, yo ho!

---
Bender1616

Lol
Poor him.
---
Myster Mask (alias Darkwing Duck)
http://www.angelfire.com/poetry/angeloflight [aX]

What am I?

I AM THE SMARTEST!
---
Pour salt in your eyes.