$5 says Wacky impales himself on his own weapon.

---
"Do me, Mac, do me!" - AdmiralViscen
SPOOKAY!™

You're just saying that because he uses an axe.

jukester

The only thing that'll happen in this fight is mommymorpher getting his ass pwned, and then me kicking j00r ass, mac.
---
"Video games don't make people more violent, and I'll kill anyone who disagrees."~~Gord from www.actsofgord.com

BLARGH!

Electricity off for 8 hours. WTF.

jukester

Should have paid your electric bill. Now get to it jukey! Your audience is turning rabid.
---
My ass can melt the ice in Ganon's Castle.~Polas

Bender- Come now, you're done here. Let's go...
Airy- Ar ar!

They leave the bar and inn place.

Bender- Hey... where's the nerdy guy and the cheap bastard with too much cologne?
Airy- Ar ar?
Bender- Yeah they probably did.
Airy- Ar.
Bender- Yeah me, too.
Airy- Ar ar ar.
Bender- Well, that's just a given.
Airy- Ar?
Bender- No, they aren't hairy. Stop that.
Airy- Ar ar ar? Ar ar... ar ar ar?
Bender- I bet you would lick them. You had sex with a zombie girl!
Airy- Ar! AR!
Bender- Hey! Alissa isn't a man! Honest!
Airy- Ar...
Bender- Oh yeah? Well... DAMMIT. I'll get you one of these days, seel.

jukester

This'll have much more next week, starting Sunday. I have like, two days of school total.

jukester

Sunday? Great Slap to the Head! That's today!

*waits with popcorn*
---
I am Melon, You are Melon...
We Are All Melon

Warlock and Duel catch up to Ganondork, who furiously is searching for LikeWhoa. They're in Lasly, so he's getting close.

Ganondork- Fiddle nuff!
Warlock- Don't you mean fiddle sticks?
Duel- I LIKE STICKS!
Warlock- Easy now, kiddo.
Ganondork- Err... why did you follow me?
Duel- Would you have rather "followed" me?????
Ganondork- I don't like where you're going with that innuendo.
Duel- ... In YOUR end-o!
Warlock- Wouldn't it be yo- wait, nevermind. So where is this thing that has your family jewel?
Duel- FAMILY JEWEL! FAMILY JEWEL!
Ganondork- No!
Warlock- Damn. Well... uhhh... hey this is where Duel and I met up with that McGray character.
Duel- Ahh the memories....
Warlock- Why are you reaching into your pants?
Duel- Because SOMEone won't!

They stare around blankly, and then their attention is brought to the smell of urine.

jukester

Haha! That's one of the best dialogues ever.

---
"Do me, Mac, do me!" - AdmiralViscen
SPOOKAY!™

QoL- Hey... we're finally here.
McGray- .. Where? Parallo?
QoL- No. Egypt.
McGray- Smells too good for Egypt.
HoT- That's just me pancakes.
McGray- You make pancakes?
HoT- No, I found them.
McGray- I bet you did.... IN MY PANTS.
QoL- I'd eat my own **** before I eat a pancake that was in your pants.
McGray- Arr oh eff ell.
QoL- ..Do you know that language, HoT?
HoT- Must be a dialect from the east.
QoL- Weirdos from the east.
HoT- Aye.
McGray- Double you tee eff?

QoL smacks McGray's forehead.

McGray- FINE! Let's go find those friend-type persons.
HoT- Yes, they should be here.
QoL- I smell... JJ. He's up in that loft. The others are probably there, too.
McGray- Ah yes, JJ. Pungent as usual.

jukester

The trio of HoT, QoL and McGray enter the loft.

McGray- Ahh!

He screams girlishly as he sees a half nude DP.

HoT- Our thoughts flow together.
QoL- You losers never seen a nipple before?
McGray- Only my... mother's....
QoL- You sick sack of crap.
McGray- I may be a sack of crap but my immune system is incredible!
JJ- Shaddap.
McGray- JJ!
JJ- McGroin!
McGray- Oh JJ!
JJ- Oh McGoya bean.

DP wakes up.

DP- MCGRAY!

She gets up and hugs him. McGray starts having a seizure.

DP- Ack! What's with him?!?
QoL- Your bare breast touched him.
DP- Oh.

She darts her eyes and covers up.

Wacky chops off Mommorpher's foot with his dive. Mommorpher had tried to dodge it again, but was too slow.

Wacky- Try to run now, *****!
Mommorpher- WHAT KIND OF INHUMANE CHARACTER CHOPS OFF A FOOT!
Wacky- Shut up. And eat your damn peas.

Walking back to Monica, Wacky slashes one of Mommorpher's underling's face off.

Wacky- You know what needs to be done now.
Monica- Are you sure?
Wacky- These monkeys can handle the rest.

They walk off.

Scott- Hey! That guy and the female are going somewhere!
BO- Let's follow!
Scott- Since when did you start making decisions?
BO- ... Let's follow!
Scott- Yay!

They follow like chimps in the trees, jumping from branch to branch.

Sapphire- Ok... everybody alright?
Mac- I'm fine.
Smokey- I'm good.
Beefer- BEefer am SCHWELLL!!
Antallic- I've got an abrasion in my flactoid.
Sapphire- Where's Wacky?
Mac- And Monica?
Canadian- I'd whistle if I had a whistle.

jukester

Neato.
---
Tha2000

Ganondork- Hmm... it smells pretty bad here. I feel sorry for the laddy who lives here.
Warlock- Yeah no kidding.
Duel- Hey! Isn't that the squirrel?

He points to mug of ale nearly empty where Likewhoa sits.

Likewhoa- Snorgle bloof?!?
Ganondork- There you are, you wretch!

Ganondork dashes for the mug as Likewhoa scampers out of the mug and onto the floor. But having drunk a mug of old ale, he tips over and falls unconscious.

Ganondork- Aha! Blimey, there's me pendant!

He grabs it and puts it neatly in his pocket. He picks up Likewhoa and they walk back to Parallo.

Sapphire- Alright... we're done here.
Mommorpher- Blurg....
Sapphire- Shut up!

They leave Mommorpher laying there alone and legless. ZiH and DL approach from the shadows.

DL- Did you pull it off?
Mommorpher- Ugh... heal me...
ZiH- Answer the question.
Mommorpher- Err... yes.
DL- Good. Give us the crystals you have recovered, then.
Mommorpher- I have three....

ZiH and DL glance at each other.

DL- Give them to us now, or we kill you.
Mommorpher- Ain't that easy... they're locked up somewhere and I'm the onl-

He's picked up by the neck and dragged away.

jukester

Damn writer's block. I can't write well today.

And even if I could, I'd be writing my Othello essay which is due tomorrow.

jukester

AV kneels down in his dojo's back room. He closes his eyes as candles burn bright and the room darkens.

AV- Polas... can you hear me.
Polas- No.
AV- So it is you, old friend. Please, I must know how to stop the Ascension.
Polas- That'd take me explaining a lot of stuff. Stuff that makes my head hurt. And you know my stance on things that make my head hurt.
AV- ZiH and DL are getting closer to it, I can tell.
Polas- Yeah, they are. That McGray and his little buddies can hold them back, I'm sure. But I doubt they can actually stop them from Ascending.
AV- You know, DL is of wind. He'll replace you. ZiH is fire, replacing Krosser.
Polas- F'real?
AV- Yes, sir.
Polas- **** the head hurtingness, I'll tell ya. So... all you know of the Ascension is that it makes people gods, right?
AV- Correct.
Polas- Then what I'm about to tell you will make you piss yourself. Well, it'd make a normal man piss himself. You might break a window or something. Anywho, in order to Ascend, one needs three objects. The Destinae Dominus, the Astral Dominae, and the Chaos Moliri.
AV- Where are these.. artifacts?
Polas- Mars says that the Astral Dominae is on one of his water elemented people. He's had it for a while, it seems.
AV- The Chaos Moliri?
Polas- Well, that's been broken into four pieces based on element. You know them as the Elemental Crystals.
AV- Which are separated.
Polas- Don't be so sure. Some kid that is a gang leader collected three.
AV- Dammit. Where is he?
Polas- Pff. I dunno.
AV- Fine. What about the other one?
Polas- The Destinae Dominus. Lost. Probably in the ocean. Supposedly, someone stole it. Damned if I know why. ...Just kidding, Satan.

The fires of hell grumble.

AV- Hmm.. Well the odds of DL and ZiH ascending are slim, correct?
Polas- Yeah sure. Just as long as McGray and company are kept on track.
AV- I'll see it through, Polas. Thank you, God bless.
Polas- I am God. And I do bless.

jukester

Nice.
---
"Board 548: We Are So Much Better Than You."

Good episode.

---
"But getting felt up by Bender is so refreshing."-Alissa
FRONTENAC -=- Vote me as Favorite Female for the ZSB PCA! -=-

DP- Are you okay, McGray?

McGray thinks to himself.

McGray- Must think of something intellectual to say in response to my earlier foul up. Think think think. Bananahammock.

jukester

ZiH- Get them. Now.
Mommorpher- Being that I have no foot, I'll have some trouble.
DL- **** you.
Mommorpher- Why thank you.
ZiH- What happened man. You used to be reliable.
Mommorpher- ME? Never!
ZiH- Yeah you're right.
DL- Doesn't change the fact that we need those crystals.
ZiH- And now.

Mommorpher thinks for a few moments.

Mommorpher- Fine.

He tosses them a key.

Mommorpher- That's all you need.
ZiH- Good.

They walk away leaving Mommorpher satisfied that he isn't dead. Just then, Wacky sneaks up behind him and whispers something.

Wacky- See you in Hell.

He then proceeds to axe Mommorpher squarely in the back.

jukester

DP- What happened?
McGray- Well I got a pair and went to help people who would otherwise get killed. In return for my efforts to keep them safe and alive, they made me scented candles.
DP- Wait, I forgot that I really don't care.
McGray- So I have some extras since I did an extra good job.
DP- Dandy. Now, fondle me.
McGray- W-what?
DP- Nothing.

She darts her eyes confused and walks away.

QoL- ...Wow. How could actually miss a chance to tap that.
McGray- Excuse me?
QoL- Since you got here, she was practically throwing herself at you.
JJ- She ain't gettin' none from Grand Master JJ, that's why.
QoL- That's great, no one asked you, kiddo.
JJ- FOIN!
QoL- For the record, I don't like it when you talk.
JJ- Alright, Chief.
HoT- What are you staring at, McGray?
McGray- ...Not.... boobies....
HoT- Oh, well then. I lost interest.

A mysterious figure appears in front of McGray, ghostly in appearance. He motions towards the window where the apparition moves to.

McGray- Why?

McGray takes slow steps towards the window. The apparition continues pulling McGray towards him. Eventually, McGray falls out the window.

jukester

A cliffhanger? You monster.
---
"Habnot- I think God's telling me something along the lines of... he hates you." - The Jenius of Jukester

McGray's a genius!
---
Board 548: We eat penguins.
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.

McGray regains balance. He stands up and dusts himself off.

McGray- Damn plumbing.... what the heck? What's this? A.. map of some sort?

The apparition reappears.

McGray- YOU AGAIN!

McGray jumps at the apparition, but being that it's an apparition, he glides right through it. The apparition scowls and speaks.

???- McGray... follow the map to the island.
McGray- Oh yeah? Well I don't HAVE a map.
???- Don't be silly.
McGray- I'm not being silly.
???- Then don't be yourself.
McGray- That hurts.
???- Just follow the map to the island. This will help you save the world.
McGray- Last time I fell for that, I woke up with glitter on my pelvis.
???- How disturbing. But really, I don't care. If you don't find the tablet there, all life will cease to exist.
McGray- Does that include trees?
???- ....Yes, it includes trees.
McGray- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
???- Then you'll do the right thing. You will see me there....

The spirit disappears into a puff of smoke. Just then, DP, QoL and HoT appear around the corner.

DP- There you are!
McGray- Here are me.
HoT- What happened?
McGray- Just got sent on a mission by a ghastly apparition which leads me into the middle of nowhere to find a tablet.
QoL- Nothing unusual.
McGray- Rightio.

jukester

Go to an island to find a tablet? I had to do that once. School project.
---
My ass can melt the ice in Ganon's Castle.~Polas

McGray- So I have to go somewhere.
AV- Yeah, you have to go get those crystals.
McGray- ...AV!?!?!
AV- Shut up. Unless you get those crystals, something terrible will happen.
QoL- Who's this ass?
AV- Who's this *****?

They point at each other.

McGray- Uhhh this is AV, dojo leader of my home town.
AV- So who IS this.
QoL- I'm an artifact of the gods.
AV- **** *****.
QoL- Really.
HoT- He is, I saw him descend.
AV- I trust the smart guy.
McGray- Thank you.
AV- Not you.
McGray- Oh...
AV- Get going to Bregenek. Much awaits you there.

In Bregenek....

Wacky- Yeah and then I heaved my axe right in his back!
Monica- Yay!
Sapphire- Rockin'.
Mac- Good for you.
Wacky- Is that sass, foreigner?
Mac- **** off.
Wacky- **** ***** ***** YOUR ***** ASS.
Mac- Heh heh.

Wacky grabs his axe and Mac pulls out his sword in retaliation.

Monica- Whoa whoa whoa... this can't end well.
Antallic- Yes it can.
Monica- Shut up and put some pants on.
Antallic- Yes ma'am.

Canadian- Come on, Wacky. Let it go.
Wacky- Who the hell are you? And shut up.
Canadian- Ok, sir.
Smokey- Look!

He points at DL and ZiH approaching. They now possess the crystals of Fire, Water, and Wind.

Wacky- Sup ****ers?
DL- Oh hello there, Wacky. Good seeing you again.
Mac- You know these guys, Wacky?
Wacky- They're ****ers.
Mac- These are the same ones...
ZiH- Who tried to kill you yes that's us. Oh hello Tatl.
Tatl- Spawn of crapmonster.
Sapphire- What, do you two think you can actually take all of us?
Beefer- RargHr! Ho ragrhra!

DL and ZiH glance at each other.

DL- Yeah, we can.

jukester

Me and BO need to get back in the action.
---
Board 548: We eat penguins.
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.

Bender- Wait, so where is everyone?
Airy- Ar ar!
Bender- That won't help us.
Airy- Ar ar ar ar ar!
Bender- No, my pants aren't concealing a raft.
Airy- Ar ar?
Bender- I guess we walk.

Suddenly, a voice speaks out to Airy.

Airy- Ar????

He hops away.

Bender- Hmm. I guess we head south then out west from there. We should approach.. hey are you listening? ....Airy?

He turns around and looks for him.

Bender- Blast that stupid panda! ... I mean seal.

He sees Airy in the distance.

Bender- Aha! There's that stupid panda! ... I mean seal.

Airy flaps and then hops into a boat.

Bender- NOOO!!! Don't go, stupid panda! ... I mean seal. WAIT!

Airy- Arr?

Bender catches up.

Bender- Where you goin'?
Airy- Ar ar ar. Ar ar ar ar ar ar ar ar ar. Ar ar ar, ar ar ar ar ar ar, ar ar ar ar. Ar ar ar ar. Ar ar ar, ar ar ar ar ar. Ar.
Bender- WHY!!!???
Airy- Ar.
Bender- WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME BOOBS WERE INVOLVED!?!?

Bender jumps in the boat. They sail off.

Bender- Wait so who's the guy?
Fishy- Hey guys!

jukester

That is sooo me.
---
The only thing you'll ever succeed at is failure

Someone should compile this all into one file. It's gold.

---
"Arr! Ye be sexy!" - Pirate Hot-line
SPOOKAY!™

McGray's gathering meets back at Parallo Square, where familiar faces bombard McGray's senses. He's stunned at seeing Duel being a few inches taller, JJ's groin expanding, and Warlock not being dead yet.

McGray- Ahh they seem to be all fine. I'm still surprised no one has knived Warlock in the face yet. Geez, with his face? Geez. And Suicune. I wonder if she remembers that night long ago when were alone in th- WTF. What is that in Ganondork's pants... it's large... and MOVING??!?! WTF. It's coming out of his pants... it's furry.... a.. squirrel? OH CRAP. He caught me staring at his crotch. Must...say...somnething...save...reputation... HOLY SON OF A PEDOPHILE!

They glance around blankly.

LikeWhoa- Rawr? Moofle gloorb!

jukester

I have all of the sitcom since this summer saved, Mac.
---
"You do not know, my son, with how little wisdom the world is governed." ~ Axel Oxenstierna {åß}

My favorite part of this sitcom is when I said stuff.

---
"But getting felt up by Bender is so refreshing."-Alissa

Bender- Where're we headed?
Fishy- To an island place.
Bender- Why?
Airy- Ar!
Bender- Oh yeah, boobs.
Fishy- Hey, we're here.

They get out of the cheaply made boat, which then collapses.

Fishy- Didn't need it anyway.
Bender- DAMMIT. How are we gonna get off this island?
Airy- Ar.
Bender- Island of boobs!
Fishy- Well that was just a line to lure you in.
Bender- Bwah?
Fishy- I actually wanted to see if there was any food here.
Bender- There's food in town.
Fishy- So there is.

They stand there blankly.

jukester

Wacky- Peh! Pushover crackos!

Wacky pulls out his axe, still wet with Mommorpher.

ZiH- Heh heh.... At least we've all been introduced.
Wacky- Shut up, ****.
DL- Now now Wacky... let's not get riled up. Remember what happens when you get riled up?
Monica- What do you want.
ZiH- To know where the last crystal is.
Monica- We don't have it. Or know where it is.

Mac whispers to the rest.

Mac- We should prepare to attack them when they least expect it.
Sapphire- Good plan. What are we gonna do, sneak up behind them?
Mac- Shut up. It'll work!
Sapphire- In hell, yes.
Mac- I'll gladly send you there to test it out.

They draw their weapons and back away so that they're out of DL's and ZiH's line of sight.

DL- So if we HAVE to kill you, we will. Easy as that.
Wacky- **** off. Two against... twelve? HAHAHAHA!
ZiH- So you want to fight? Let's fight.
Wacky- You betcha.

Just then, Mac and Sapphire do a diving slash at DL, who forms an energy field around himself and pushes them away with great might.

Monica- What the hell....
Wacky- Magic? Ha! That's for ****ies which is why you use it!

Wacky swings at ZiH, who stands there confidently.

DL- ****!

Wacky's axe leaves a large gash on ZiH's arm and chest. ZiH falls to the ground.

Wacky- *****! Where's your magic now?

jukester

Well, Wacky appears to be kicking suitable arse today.
---
"You do not know, my son, with how little wisdom the world is governed." ~ Axel Oxenstierna {åß}

I ALWAYS kick ass, HoT. ALWAYS!
---
"Video games don't make people more violent, and I'll kill anyone who disagrees."~~Gord from www.actsofgord.com

Quite.....
---
"You do not know, my son, with how little wisdom the world is governed." ~ Axel Oxenstierna {åß}

...and then Wacky tripped and killed himself with his own axe. The end.

---
"Arr! Ye be sexy!" - Pirate Hot-line
SPOOKAY!™

mac, didn't you post something like this in the topic once before? For some reason, I remember that line...
---
"Video games don't make people more violent, and I'll kill anyone who disagrees."~~Gord from www.actsofgord.com

lol
Nice job jukester.
But I never say "what the hell". I only say "what the ****".
---
Myster Mask (alias Darkwing Duck)
http://www.angelfire.com/poetry/angeloflight [aX]

I am RIVETED by my island adventure!

---
"But getting felt up by Bender is so refreshing."-Alissa

Sometimes I give myself an expletive limit.

jukester

ZiH- Pain!
DL- What the hell... you aren't supposed to feel pain...
ZiH- No... give me the crystals....
DL- Oh... I see....
ZiH- Please....

DL stands up and faces Wacky, who prepares to axe ZiH again.

DL- ******.

DL casts a spell at Wacky. Wacky is momentarily frozen.

Monica- ****! What the hell?!?? WHAT! No!

She unsheathes her katana. Its glimmer in the afternoon sun creates a reddish glow. Sapphire and Mac regain footing. The three attack DL.

DL- Ha!

He flies up. ZiH lies there in pain.

ZiH- No...

Mac prepares to stab ZiH. Just then, DL casts a spell at ZiH and he levitates as well. Tatl pulls out her wand and unfreezes Wacky.

Wacky- **** that's cold ass ****! What the ****? Flying *****es!

Canadian draws his bow and shoots at DL who just controls the arrow and sends it back at Canadian, who dodges it.

Canadian- What's that aboot, eh?

Scott and BO see this. ZiH and DL levitate right near where they are in the tree.

BO- Who's that?
Scott- Evil boss guy!
BO- No the other one.
Scott- Evil boss guy?
BO- Oh. Well let's do something. Evil is bad.
Scott- And evil.
BO- Good point, yesh.

jukester

STABBITY!
---
Et Eärello Endorenna utúlien. Sinome maruvan ar Hildinyar tenn' Ambar-metta!=>Aragorn {åß}

Canadian- What's that aboot, eh?

LOL

---
"I don't like your plan. It sucks."-Yuna

Pfft, he stole that from my writing in that other storyline.
---
Et Eärello Endorenna utúlien. Sinome maruvan ar Hildinyar tenn' Ambar-metta!=>Aragorn {åß}

More!
---
Myster Mask (alias Darkwing Duck)
http://www.angelfire.com/poetry/angeloflight [aX]

McGray- Hey kids! I'm not here right now because I'm playing the MMRPG!
Duel- What's the MMRPG? *Humps a tree*
McGray- Oh you silly boy! It's the Majora's Mask Role Playing Game!
Duel- Can I play, too! PLEASE!?
McGray- Yes you can, junior! Just follow the path!

McGray points to the path labelled http://com1.runboard.com/bgamefaqs

Duel- Wow! I can be a Deku, an Ikanan, and many more!
McGray- Yes! And it's absolutely free!
Duel- Play it now and be cool!

jukester

Holy advertisement, Jukey! I think everyone shoulder listen to McGray, dont'y you all?
---
"You do not know, my son, with how little wisdom the world is governed." ~ Axel Oxenstierna {åß}